Asher Cohen
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Senior Software Engineer role

A critique of the current state of the market

EDITED: This is a fake job posting. Have a laugh.

Senior Software Engineer Location: Remote/Hybrid
Salary: $120K - $180K + Equity
Experience: 3-8 years

At AutoCorp, we've revolutionized the workplace by doing what everyone said was impossible: we automated management, not talent. While other companies replace their creative workforce with AI, we took the bold step of replacing our entire executive team with advanced AI systems.

  • CEO - Strategic vision and quarterly planning
  • CTO - Technical roadmap and architecture decisions
  • Product-Owner - Feature prioritization and user story generation
  • Scrum-Master - Sprint planning and velocity optimization
  • HR-Assistant - Performance reviews and team happiness metrics

By eliminating human management overhead, we've achieved a 340% reduction in unnecessary meetings, a 89% decrease in contradictory directives, and a 156% increase in actual productive work time.

What You'll Do

  • Pure Development Work - No more "quick syncs" or "alignment meetings"
  • Creative Problem Solving - Our AI managers never micromanage implementation details
  • Autonomous Decision Making - Choose your own tools, frameworks, and approaches
  • Focus on Craft - Spend 90% of your time actually coding instead of explaining why you need time to code

What We're Looking For

  • Software Development Experience - You know how to build things
  • Independent Thinking - Since you won't have a human boss changing requirements every week
  • Collaboration Skills - Work directly with designers, QA, and other developers
  • Adaptability - Our AI systems are surprisingly consistent, but technology evolves

Bonus

  • Experience working in environments with minimal bureaucracy
  • History of thriving without constant supervision
  • Previous frustration with human management inefficiencies

What We DON'T Require

  • ❌ Experience with "AI tools" (our AIs handle the AI stuff)
  • ❌ Prompt engineering skills
  • ❌ "Familiarity with generative AI workflows"
  • ❌ Ability to "leverage AI to boost productivity"

AI-Optimized Work Environment

  • Meetings scheduled only when algorithmically determined to be necessary

  • Performance reviews based on actual code quality and delivery metrics

  • Project timelines set by realistic AI estimation models, not executive wishful thinking

  • Competitive salary (we save millions on executive compensation)

  • Equity in a company with 90% lower overhead costs

  • Annual profit-sharing from our management cost savings

Our AI executives have analyzed thousands of successful companies and determined that the key to success is:

  • Hire talented people
  • Give them interesting problems
  • Provide adequate resources
  • Get out of their way

Revolutionary, we know.

Interview Process

  • Technical Interview - Actual coding, reviewed by senior developers
  • Culture Fit - 15-minute chat about working autonomously

Ready to Join the Future of Work? Apply now to experience what happens when companies automate management instead of talent.